Saturday, July 23, 2016

Sinful Sunday - 3 Rings

One almost fits the shaft only, one is really tight and one is a lot of fun.




Sinful Sunday

Sick sex

I have been sick.  Very sick.  It happens about once a year or so.  Some bug gets a hold of me and crawls into the depths of my lungs and just fucks shit up.  It started on Thursday night with a little tickle and a cough...nothing much.  I thought I had inhaled some insect spray I was putting down to try and keep nature at bay.

Friday morning I knew it was something different.  I had a full day and could not sleep or rest and by that evening I knew it was not going to be good.  I have spent the last few days in a dark room drinking water, coughing up buckets of shit and sleeping.  Today I feel half normal so I am back at work, however I am now coughing again.  That is the trouble with being the owner, boss, worker and main cog in the machine that runs my financial life, I can't take time off.  I have a prescription on the way, I was finally diagnosed, Walking Pneumonia...no bueno.

So where is the sex?

I usually get myself off either daily or every other day.  Many days it is two or three times a day.  I don't like those multiple times a day ones, I tend to get a bit numb and that will lead to trouble getting off when I am with a woman.  If I keep it to a light touch and once every other day, I am good.

When I get sick the desire for sex is not there at first.  After a day or two it comes on.  It is the weirdest feeling of wanting to just lay there and die and to release.  As some point my body just tells me, get the poison out.  I am not comfortable, my muscles are sore, my head hurts a bit, I am having trouble breathing without any exertion.

It is like a job, a force of will.  The porn is not sexy porn.  The mental image and story is not well developed.  I just want to maximize visual stimulation so I can cum quickly.  Taboo stuff usually does it:  brother and sister, teacher and student, daddy and daughter, babysitter, neighbor, gang bang, rough blowjob.  I am not proud of what gets me off quickly.

There is the trouble with maintaining an erection while sick.  The exertion and the profuse sweating.  The nagging feeling that I should not be horny like this.  It is never that good.  The release makes me feel a little better but tired, more sick for a while.  However, it takes the desire out of my mind.  I don't have that nagging feeling of horniness.

Tell me I am not alone here...or am I?

Wednesday, July 20, 2016

Wicked Wednesday #216



#1  The Dinner Party

She set the small framed painting on the table using a small clear folding easel.  The starched white tablecloth with the white round plates, white napkins, silver polished so brightly it reflected white, everything devoid of color so the painting stood out.  "It's perfect," she thought.

She looked that the clock, the food would be delivered soon, she did not want to cook tonight.  The plan was to make everything easy, clear a path for open thought and communication. There was just enough time for her to shower off and dress.  She had done her hair and make-up earlier.

The charm alerted her to the delivery boys and she buzzed him up.  She direct them where to set up and stepped back into her room to put on the final touches.  The charm went off again and her heart jumped, it was time, no turning back now.

The three of them arrived together, all laughter and smiles.  Coats were shed, kisses and the pop of champagne.  Between the food, gossip, laughter and song her big plan was forgotten, not that she minded.  The easy love and friendship was the entire reason she had planned this night.

The night moved from dining room to the couch to the bedroom, as it always did.  Four bodies together no boundaries or limits.  It was an excess of love and pleasure every time.  In the early morning, half asleep and still vibrating she remembered the picture and how it had touched her.

She wanted to share the meaning, how the four of them are one.  How their life together was so foreign to everything they knew and were raised believing.  How freeing it was to let go of those beliefs and create their own reality.  She smiled, feeling the naked bodies of he three people she loved, and loved her.  There was no need to share, they already knew.

___________________________________________________________
 #2  View From the Bed

The rain started as they walked back from the club.  The great thing about the big city is how close everything is, yet how far you must walk.  It was too short a walk for a cab, not that they would find one at this time of night on a side street.  They pulled together into a doorway for shelter for a moment.  Four hot bodies from dancing and tipsy from champagne.

The girls huddled together as their men wrapped arms around them for warmth.  It was not a cold night but the rain had a chill to it.  They laughed together, maybe the rain would let up in a bit.  As if on cue lightning flashed and the downpour deepened.  It was a hesitant but mutual decision to make a run for it.  Cell phones and wallets were stuffed for protection into clutches.

The four of them hand in hand began to run into the rain.  They were soaked in a moment, it was cold but joyful.  Them men began to hoot and yell into the clouds, the girls joined in stomping in the puddles and splashing each other.  They arrived at the apartment completely wet, shivering cold and laughing.

Clothes were coming off as soon as they hurried up the stairs and into their loft.  There were calls for towels, tea and blankets and as they each ran to fulfill a task.  Naked and chilled the girls reunited on the large sofa pressing together with the warm blankets, their with towels wrapped around their heads.  They boys entered with the warm tea, towels in mock turbans, naked, cocks swinging with broad white smiles.

Under the blankets they sipped tea and wrapped legs in silence.  Cold gave way to warmth as the empty cups were set aside.  With hands free and warm the silence was broken with moans and more laughter.  The girls slid under the blankets in unison as their men moved close to shared a kiss of their own.

As it was whenever they all made love they became a group force whose unspoken goal was ultimate pleasure and release for every one of them.  Focus shifted as energy peaked and waned from each of them to another.  It lasted for hours, edging, building, the pleasure peaking until finally the women and men as one came together.  Watching and feeling each other twist in pleasure.

In the warm afterglow, when they could open their eyes, they all seemed to be looking at the same thing.  The painting on the wall that they had found together.  The perfect embodiment of their relationship as they painted a new way in the darkness.


Wicked Wednesday... a place to be wickedly sexy or sexily wicked

#1 was a difficult one.  I knew what I wanted to say but I was having trouble saying it.  I wanted to paint a better picture.  I wanted to write the witty banter of four very smart and free people, in my clumsy hands it kept degrading into smut.  Not that I have anything against smut...it was just not what I was going for.

#2 feels better to me.  I love the idea of four people, so close, so free with their love and their acceptance that they could have a totally open physical, mental, social...etc...friendship/love.  Earlier in life I would almost experienced this many times but my history of repressive religion and social "norms" prevented me from acting on it.

This can only be a dream now.  I have broached the subject of this to my spouse, her honest response is that she would be too jealous.  When I talk to people or read about open relationships it seems like jealousy is one of the big things that cause problems.

Jealousy stems from low self esteem, from not knowing and loving yourself enough so you look for it from your partner.  It is also about possessiveness, wanting to own someone else.  The stupid thing is, jealousy always tends to push people away rather than draw then near.

The only caveat is that most of what I said applies to unwarranted jealousy.  In the case of a potentially poly-amorous relationship would the jealousy be warranted?

Many people in poly-amorous talk about meeting someone and it "feeling" right, or natural.  Does my desire to look for it, rather than having it naturally happen breed jealousy?  After all, if I was happy, why would I look for it or want it?  Does the jealousy start with me?

Meh...to much to think about today...I don't feel well.

Wednesday, July 13, 2016

Wicked Wednesday, better late than never

Wicked Wednesday... a place to be wickedly sexy or sexily wicked



 5 AM is early for most people, hell it was early for him.  Shaking the sleep from his eyes and wiping the sweat from his brow he slowed his run to a light jog.  As he neared the corner to the alley he walked and took a deep breath and stopped the music on his phone.  He punched up the audio recording and pressed play as he turned the corner.

He was never ready for the feelings, they were both crushing and exhilarating all in one.  A feeling of excitement and remorse.  It hurt every day, but he needed it right now.  He started walking down the rough pavement his eyes on the ground, breathing deeply.

Her voice echoed in his head, he could never make out what the first words were and his memory of the event was unclear.  The recording had been an accident, he had found it later and they had listened to it together and laughed, then made love.  He continued to walk down the street feeling himself harden as his senses were flooded with her imagined scent.

The rustle of the bedding as they she fell into his arms and her soft moan as she pressed against him.  Whispered promises, and more kisses, then the unmistakable uttering that shook him:

"I want your cock."

His eyes looked up to the dark window past the stairs.  His feet and body willed him to move in that direction.  He must have looked drunk to anyone watching, with his slow weaving path down the street.  He closed his eyes as he heard the clink of a belt, a zipper, the rustle of clothing, then the soft moan.

He could feel soft lips on his cock, her hand holding him.  He wanted so badly to release, he wanted to walk up those steps and knock on the door.  He could hear the sounds of her sucking him, his moans.  He stopped next to one of the street lamps and looked up at the window.

Another rustle of clothes and movement on the bed, she giggled.  He leaned against the lamp post and closed his eyes.  The vision of her half naked, dress pushed around her stomach revealing her breasts.  He strained against his tight jogging pants as he imagined her weight pressing down on his cock, the strain against the head before the wet release as she slid down him with a gasp.

She whispered to him softly, just enough for the recording to pick up.

"Fuck me."

He closed his eyes, his hips moving slightly as he remembered the deep strokes as he held her.  Her gasping, his grunting.  It was quick and passionate.  They came together he could feel her lips press against him as she shook, goose pimples raising in waves on her thigh and ass.  His release was massive and he could only cry out incoherently.

Deep breathing...

A giggle...

His chuckle...

A kiss....

More sounds of movement were all that one would hear on the recording, but he remembered the glint in her eye as she moved down and cleaned his cock.  Her dirty, erotic, tease as she sat back and scooped his cum from her pussy, letting it drip down her fingers.  Her smile as she tasted it.

The recording stopped.

His body shook as he opened his eyes and looked up to the window above.  He knew it was an empty room now.  He still paid the mortgage every month.  The key was in his pocket, he could feel the weight of it with each step, hot against his leg.

He had only been in there once since she left.  Sooner or later he would have to let it go but imagining  someone else in her space seemed impossible still.

He turned and walked away, started a slow jog as he neared the corner.  As he turned down the main street his pace quickened, the music and pounding of his heart driving out the ache and desire.

Monday, July 11, 2016

Slide down my knees and taste my sword.


So the Kink of the Week is Kneeling.  I have never considered kneeling a kink, it is just a thing you do to get lower to the ground.  If my cock is 3 feet off the ground and you are anything over 3.5 feet, you most likely will be kneeling for my blowjob.

Then I started to think...is kneeling kinky, do I have a particular attachment to kneeling or being knelt to?  Surprise, surprise...yes I do.

I like to be in control during sex.  Well, I like to be control in everything to be honest, but sex is one area where I really like to dominate.  Maybe that is the wrong word, dominate seems so harsh. It is more about who chooses the position and when to change.  I have never been with a woman who really took the reigns so I don't know how I would react to being controlled or dominated by my partner.  I will say that resisting me when I want to move to a new position turns me off like a switch.  If you don't want the position than kindly look back and say no with a smile and lets find a new one...but just pulling back and stiffening your muscles so as to not move, ruins it for me.

Back to kneeling.  As a man there is a wonderful feeling when a woman kneels before you and takes your cock in their mouth.  It is even better when you can hold their head in your hands and control the depth and speed of their cocksucking/facefucking/deepthroating experience.  I love looking down at the curves of a woman's back and ass as she sits on her knees, hair cascading and bouncing around as she takes me in.

An even better position is when I take her head in my hand and put her mount on my balls and jack off while she lathers my nethers with her saliva.  The upward looking, cock drunk eyes of a kneeling girl makes me shiver like a sweaty stallion ready to bolt.  It is usually a sure way to make me pop a load in a hurry.  I am visually wired, like many men, and the whole scene is pure porn to my eyes.

I also like the idea of kneeling as being submissive.  I would get off on someone getting off on that...if that makes sense.  Kneeling and waiting for me to use your body, I like the idea of that, any takers???  It would be fun to experiment a little.  Stay in a motionless kneeling position.  Tweek nipples, just a bit of pain.  Some slaps on the ass and legs.

I have had a girl sit on her knees, with her legs spread as I crouched behind her and fingered her to orgasm.  How fun would it be if her hands were not allowed to leave her legs.  She just had to sit and cum.  I like the idea of control on that level, never done it, but I like the idea of it.

When I was young I did not know what a BJ was, it took me a while to figure shit out, I was a late bloomer.  I do remember shortly after hearing the Montley Crue song Tonight (lyrics below).  The song is pure 80's metal sex and I can see why parents had issue with the music we listened to.  When the lead singer belted out "Slide down my knees and taste my sword", and the girl I was attracted to mouthed those words while we danced to the song...I was instantly hard.  I did not get a BJ that night, I believe she was as repressed and frustrated as I was and neither of knew what to do at the time.  The lyric has always stuck in my mind as a wonderful visual.

Go over to Kink of the Week and read what others have said about kneeling.

Tonight (Unreleased)

By Mötley Crüe
Ninety thousand screaming watts
Honey dripping from her pot
Fill the cup to the top tonight
The deadly sin is all we know
Pleasure victim who's next to fall
The question is will you please us all tonight? 

Tonight tonight tonight
We need a lover tonight
We need a lover tonight
We need a lover tonight
We need a lover 

Stand tall and ring the bell
The final stroke send you to hell
Take your body like a hammer and a nail
The taste of love, it might me yours
Slide down my knees, taste my sword
Can you feel the power inside tonight? 

Tonight tonight tonight
We need a lover tonight
We need a lover tonight
We need a lover tonight
We need a lover 

Tonight, we need a lover tonight
We need a lover tonight
We need a lover tonight
We need a lover
Tonight tonight

Saturday, July 9, 2016

Sex Factor on xHamster

A reality show for sex...why did I not think of that?!?

The show is a bit addictive and a little bit awkward, at least at first.  It is a group of people, some with really bad porn names, competing with each other...literally...WITH each other...to become the next Porn Star!

Each episode they have to do porno stuff on film.  The panel of expert veteran porn stars judge them, them eliminate one guy and one gal each week.  Typical reality show contest shit, why do I even explain this, we all know the drill.

There is one gal on this called Remy LaCroix, well, I am in fucking love with her now.  My kind of gal, a little bit more in the bubble butt realm than I have been attracted to in the past, but she works it so well I think she has converted me.

When I watch theses gals and guys have sex, the good scenes look like when I fuck.  How do I know?  Because I have filmed myself fucking quite a few times.  With a willing partner I can do all of what they do in an hour.  Face fucking, ass eating, fingering, pussy licking, ball sucking, every position under the sun and a great pop shot on the face or in the open mouth.

Granted I am in the room with one (or in one case two) girls, no camera man, no light and sound, no director and key grip...just me and she(s).  I have only had a problem keeping it hard once, and that was due to a cocktail of drugs and sleep deprivation after a BIG bender.  I wonder if I could be hard and pop on a set...not sure at all.

Part of me wants to try.  I am a bit old for generic porn.  I could be the older teacher, dad, neighbor, you get the idea.  My pool boy days are gone, but I could fit a role.  Not sure about the dialog, see my last post on why, but I am willing to learn.  I would need to get in a little better shape, athletic is good but I feel sexier without any gut at all.

I think that is the main ingredient in porn stardom.  Wanting to watch yourself.  There is also wanting to watch others watch you...Online strippers have that magic.  That is where I wonder if I have it...can I watch someone else, watch me fuck and cum.  I make jack off videos for a friend of mine every now and then.  She likes watching them and I like making them.

If you haven't seen the show, watch it here:  Sex Factor

Thursday, July 7, 2016

Waking up hard

Every day.  Without fail.

Do women wake up wet?

Almost all my dreams are erotic, I don't have regular dreams.  Even if the dream is not centered around sex and pleasure there is always that element somewhere.  Some are taboo, some are weird, some take an actual experience and rehash it with what I would have liked to happen.  I don't have a lot of nightmares anymore, but even my nightmares had sex in them.

My sister in law who I have hit on many times in a quiet way, she flirts back so it is semi-innocent.  She mentioned to me that when she wakes up she just naturally scoots over and finds her mans cock and sucks him awake.  She loves to have him cum in her mouth or on her face in the morning.  She will finger herself or sometimes fuck him, but many times just give him a good CIM-BJ.

I thought of the times I have woke up with my cock in someones mouth...none...zero...zilch...nada.

I mentioned the idea of an AM BJ to my SO and she was not to fond of the idea, she did not rule it out 100% but if looks could talk, hers would have said, "Suck your own morning dick."  I was not surprised, she is a sleeper-inner while I am an earlier-riser.  Still a guy can dream, maybe she will think about it, I do sleep later than her on Saturdays!  I am not going to hold my breath, the other issue is the quality of her head, she gives a "blow vacation", I want a "blow job".

On my own, with no interruption, I can slowly stroke my wood in a half sleep state.  Enter a state of lucid dreaming, where I control the action but my subconscious paints the view.  It can get really erotic and sensual.  When the point of release is close, I usually wake up fully.  I have never been able to have a Lucid wet-dream.

At this point I will usually grab my iPhone and porn it up for a moment.  Eye candy for the pop.  Sometimes I just stop and shower...let the feeling ride.  This will usually result in a day of extreme horniness that will eventually be resolved in a frantic 5 min jack-off in the company bathroom.

Sometimes I just need to get the poison out, clear the head.

Other times I let it build, multiple days of morning wood and play...edging.  It gets to the point where walking and the rubbing of my underwear, tight pants, everything teases me.  Constant state of erection, which can be difficult if I am out in public.  I let it build until all I can think about it release.

When I do cum after a couple of days of anticipation, it unleashes a flood.  I am soaked, everything is soaked.  I rest, then cum again.  It becomes a game of "How much can he cum."  I masturbate 5 to 6 times in a day.

Only then do I wake up with just a resting noodle.  Sore and hungover, I let it be.

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

I believe it is over

Many people will have no idea of what I am talking about when I say it is over between The Spinner and I.  I do not directly talk about her on this blog anymore since The Other Guy started reading my blog.  There have been long absences and some reconnection through that time and I do not want to even go into the whole story.

The important and sad and happy part is that it is finally over.  I need to move on with my life and I need to reconnect with my wife or I am going to lose my marriage.  I do not want to "abandon" her, I was hoping to help her until she got stable then just remain friends on some level or just say goodbye. 

Unfortunately I do not think that day is coming anytime soon.  I really thought that she was going to live with The Other Guy and I would never see her again.  That is what would be best for her, but she does not see it.

So, in the guilt and worry of how to say goodbye, I just made some stupid drama (I know, not very adult like).  It did not work out so well, she is that master of drama and I detest it, I was way out of my element.  In the end I just said the truth.  I need to focus on my marriage and I can't deal with the guilt anymore, I don't want a divorce and I need to pay for counseling for us.

She did not take it well, I got about 10 long texts from her, I got about 4 words into the first text and just deleted them.  They were mean, I get it, but I don't have to read it.  It is just, unfortunately, over.  I always say,

"Nothing ends well.  If it did, it would not end.  Things end painfully, so they stay ended."

Well, this ended painfully and it will stay ended.  I feel sadness, hope and promise.  Also, a little fear, I do not know how the counseling will go...

Teach me to talk dirty

I struggle with dirty talk.  When I hear my voice say something during foreplay or sex it sounds either too vulgar or too passive.  I am either an asshole or a wimp.

I would like to give direction, strong masculine, sensual and erotic instructions.  I love girls who are submissive, not subservient or groveling or abused.  I love a girl who wants to be controlled and told what to do, and who loses herself in the pleasure and anticipa....

How do you get good at this?  How do you gain the confidence and find the proper words?  Practice I guess...

There are words I stumble over and most likely do not need to be said.

Ass
Pussy
Finger
Cunt
Cock
Balls
Fuck
Suck
Wet

Well, some of them need to, and should be said.

The example I will use, and I dream about:

I dream this but it never seems to come out this way, my voice sounds pinched or nervous...

I am in my dress pants and shirt, tie untied, glass of tequila in my hand, sitting in a leather chair.

She is in a dress, heels, jewelry, small clutch.

Lights are low, but we can still see, lots of deep shadows.  After each of the..commands?  instructions?  I would watch for a minute or more...it depends on her response.

Me:  You should take off those panties.  (Already it does not sound right to me)

Start over....

Me (again):  Let me see your legs, hike that dress up a little.   Higher.....higher....h.i.g.h.e.r.  Turn around.  higher...

Me:  Slip your panties down a little, not all the way.  Turn around and look at me.

Me:  Come closer.

Me:  Slip your panties to your knees.  Turn around again.   Bend over a little, show me.

 Me:  Touch yourself, is your pussy wet?  Show me...  I want to watch you play with your pussy.

Me (after a little while):  Slip your panties all the way off.  Give them to me.

I would take them and smell them, then put them in my shirt pocket.  (Why?  I don't know...is that even sexy?)  Then I watch without touching as she plays with her pussy.

Me: Stop, turn around and face me.  Can you take your dress off, all the way?

She takes off her dress revealing her lacy bra underneath.

Me:  You are look amazing, show me your breasts.

She takes off her bra and sets it to the side with her dress.

Me:  Get your fingers wet again, come closer and show me.

Me:  Taste your fingers, do you like the way you taste?

Me:  Let me taste your fingers now.

She would take her wet fingers and place them in my mouth, I would gently suck and lick them.

Me:  Lay on the bed.  I want you to touch your breasts softly, just caress them.

Me:  Now a little rougher, pinch them a little.  Show me how you like them to be touched and played with.

Me:  Now play with your pussy also, just the outside, no fingers...yet.

Me (when seeing her get more excited):  Don't let yourself cum yet, stop before it happens and take your hands off.

I would watch her almost cum a few times, maybe twice.

Me:  Use your fingers inside now, but still do not cum.

This time I would stand and walk over to her, just close enough but not touching and watch until she stopped again.

Me:  Get on all fours for me, let me see your wonderful ass.  Put your hands between your legs, lay down on your chest a little, ass up in the air.  Give me your hands.

I would then take my tie off and use it to bind her hands together, not tight, just the feeling of restriction.

Me:  Tell me before your cum.

I would kneel and begin to lick her from clit to ass.  Then work on her lips and clit.

Me:  Use your hands, open your pussy and show me where you want me to lick and how hard.

I would watch and follow her finger tips.  Licking, kissing, sucking and following her verbal commands.  When she tells me she is cumming I will slip a finger in and bring her off.  As she recovers I will remove the tie from her hands and let her roll over on the bed.  Then I will go and sit in the chair again, sipping my drink.

Me (once she is recovered):  Would you like to pleasure me?  Come over here and kneel, bring a pillow for your knees.

Me:  When I tell you to stop, you must stop, don't let me cum yet.  Open my pants and take you my cock.

Me:  The rest is up to you.

I would warn her before I came.  I would let her get me close a couple of times.

Me:  Stand up and turn around.

I would take my tie and gently blindfold her then lead her to the bed and lay her down.  I would take a pillow and place it under her hips.

Me:  Wait here for me.

I would get undressed then walk to the edge of the bed and slowly kneel between her legs.

Me:  Take my cock and rub your pussy with it, get it wet.

I would move just close enough to let her rub on the head and shaft but move away from any penetration.  When it just became too much for either of us I would penetrate and slowly fuck until we both came.