An old flame...

I can see now how Facebook can get a person in trouble.

I got a request for friendship!  The name was familiar but not recognizable.  I sent a message asking for more info on how we were connected.  I have a lot of privacy on my FB account, part because of my job and position in the community and I don't need everyone knowing my private life.  Mostly because of my habits and dalliances and I don't want anyone finding me who should not.

Usually if I as a person for more info they do not respond.  However, she did respond with her maiden name.  I thought I knew who it was but asked again for more specific details so I could place her in my memory.  She responded, letting me know that she dated my best friends and was at my wedding...

Did we flirt, but never date...I asked...

Yes...lol...

Bingo...

I remembered her...

She was pure sex.  She excited me beyond any measure but was always involved with someone I knew.  We flirted heavily...very heavily...loads of sexual tension between us.

At one point she told me that she had a contest with her friend...who could sleep with the most people before they turned 18.  I had smiled, she smiled...she was unattached and so was I.  It was during a time when my wife and I were split up.  Just before my first child was born.  Silent agreement, tonight would be the night we were going to hook up.

We traveled with a group of friends to some hot springs and swam naked...all of us.  What a wonderful time to be naked and young.  It was very dark out so there was not a lot to see.  Her friend was lingering by me, I remember the friend being a bit gothic and not all that attractive to me.  I spent most of my time watching her from afar and waiting.

We all went to a campsite and drank and ate together, laughing.  We started to play tag or hid and seek, a juvenile game that was an excuse to touch each other.  We went to hide together, behind a tree.  I don't remember if we said anything but we kissed.  It lasted a while then she broke it off and told me we could not...

It seemed that her gothic friend had called dibs on my skinny ass that night, I was taken.  I had already upset the situation by paying more attention to her then her friend.  I remember not really giving a shit and telling her so.  But, the old adage of "Chicks before Dicks" was in play and it became obvious that this chance was not to be.  I remember at one point having the gothic girl rolling on top of me with the FB friend next to me...we kissed while she was not looking.

That was it...never again do I remember seeing, hearing or talking to her.  I can say that I frequently remember my missed chance to be with her and regret not just making it a point to be inside of her.  As a much more vocal adult I wonder why I did not suggest a gothic, FB friend three-way...I am sure they would have been down with it.  I had about 4 chances in my youth to have a good three-way, but due to my religious upbringing and the lack of the internet or accessible porn, I did not know to even ask.

I wanted to let her know that I remembered all of this...

I wanted to let her know that I still think of here every now and again...

I wanted to let her know that a hook up, while improbable due to geography, is still possible...

She looks good on FB...

I now see how FB can be dangerous....

But I did not.

I wonder what she is thinking, half a country away, chatting with me...what does she REALLY remember?  Would she even say?