TMI Tuesday...

TMI Tuesday time. Answer these interesting questions adapted from Red Lipstick Project’s Sexual IQ test.

1. You want to make love, but your partner says they’re too tired:
A. You’re annoyed and frustrated.
B. It’s a bummer, but you understand they’ve had a long day.
C. You give your partner an awkwardly long hug and say you’re happy to wait. It’s better when you’re both into it.
D. You get nervous and worried. Maybe your partner is cheating or doesn’t think you’re attractive anymore.

It can be any of the three other than D.  I do understand being tired, I do understand being gassy, I do understand that the mood needs to be right.  However, when it is a daily thing for months and years...I get a bit annoyed and frustrated.  Sex is a rather important thing and the lack of sex can lead a man to look to other venues to get fulfilled.  In a perfect world making love just happens when both people feel it will happen, in the real world it either gets scheduled like a chore or it just goes to the wayside.

2. Who is having better sex? You or your best friends?
A. I am, obviously.
B. We don’t talk about our sex lives. Ever.
C. We all have our good times and bad times. We don’t usually compare.
D. My friends have all the good sex. I can’t keep up.

I really don't know, if we are talking about sex with the spouse it would most likely be my best friend.  I have not had sex with the wife in about 4 months now.  If we are talking about any sex at all...still don't know.  He is a rather wild guy and likes things to go well so I imagine his sex is rather good.  If I had to  guess I would say it's a tie.

3. How do you feel right after sex?
A. Sweaty and ready to shower. A little gross.
B. Satisfied and energized. Ready to take on the world.
C. Calm and happy, falling asleep.
D. A bit let down and tired.

I have felt all four.  Many times with the wife it is right before bed time or past bed time.  We only seem to fuck in the pitch black, late at night.  In those cases I feel like I want a shower and a little gross.  I don't want to spend the night sticking to the sheets.  I have also felt this way when a professional visit did not go the way I imagined.  A few times when I started doing this I would meet a girl who had misrepresented herself in her pictures.  For some reason I felt I needed to go through with it because I had asked for their time.  I always felt disgusting after, so I learned to walk away.

With a great escort I will feel satisfied and energized, an hour of great sex with a willing partner who is there it make sure I have a great time can make me fell like a million bucks.  This is what keeps people like me, doing what we do.  I don't even like to wash after this kind of sex, I want to feel and smell sex for the rest of the day.

Rarely do I feel calm and happy and fall asleep.  I usually do not have the time.  It would be nice to have the time to just sit and relax.  I am hoping to take a girl on a business trip one day and just be able to fuck and sleep.  It have never worked out when I have tried in the past.

I have also felt let down, it usually happens when my ATF/SB puts me off for another person, makes me wait for no reason, or treats me like a chore that she has to get done.  It makes me feel old, dirty, and just tired of doing what I am doing.  I sometimes walk away wishing I had masturbated at home instead.  It also makes me mad, I don't know why I cannot be getting this at home...

4. Which is better? Being a man or woman?
A. Men have it so much easier
B. Women have it so much easier
C. I’m having too much fun being me to worry about it.
D. Is there really much of a difference?

I only know one side of this, the man part, so everything else is just a guess.  Being a man is rather great.  I can pee standing up, for the most part I am bigger and stronger, I get to shoot guns, hunt, fish, watch and play sports.  Guys shit is just cooler than girl shit in my opinion

Girls have to bleed once a month, deal with hormones, possibly get pregnant, have bitchy friends, deal with every asshole wanting to fuck them, have the demand to be at home yet get a job, push a baby out their vagina.  Girls have an impossibly high bar of body shape and beauty that beats them down all the time.  Girl stuff sounds awful.

But, girls get to wear some awesome clothes, they get to hug and cuddle with friends without it being gay, girls get multiple orgasms, that in and of itself is awesome.  Girls can get laid at the drop of a hat.  In some instances girls get to stay home and not work.  Girls get to finger themselves whenever they want and can always look at some boobies...

Guys have to work, we have this weird sex drive that fucks with us constantly, we sink a bit more and have gas, guys are expected to be gentle yet fight when needed, we are expected to get hit and not hit back.  Guys are expected to take it all and not let any of the wounds or pain show.

They both suck...

5. You and your partner had sex that wasn’t that good. You:
A. Don’t say anything. Everyone has an off day.
B. Complain or drop hints that things better improve.
C. Consider whether you should break up. Sex is the glue to a good relationship.
D. Discuss it immediately and see if there is anything you should be doing differently.

Don't say anything, what good would it do.  If bad sex happens with my wife, and it usually is bad sex, and I try and bring up what could be better, she will go back and forth in two states:

1.  Attack mode.
2.  Crucifixion mode.

It is either my fault or EVERYTHING is her fault.  It can never be OUR fault.  It can never just be a fucking THING that we can fix together.  This is echoed in any fight or disagreement we have.  She attacks me first, then when I fight back a little she goes into the "Woe is me" act and says shit like, "Everybody just hates me and I am the worst person ever..."  and crawls on her cross and waits for everyone to kowtow to her and sooth her hurt feelings.

I could argue with her method but it has worked for 43 years.

5. What advice do you wish you had when you started having sex?
A. Sex is a great thing–healthy and fun.
B. A proper tour of the reproductive parts as errogenous zones and not from a biology point of view. Bodies are really strange and getting to know them can be awkward.
C. Sex is a beautiful thing but be careful to protect your body from STD’s and pregnancy or you won’t have as much fun.
D. Enjoy sex while you can, because it gets worse as you get older.

I would say all of it.  I would go back and tell myself to just start fucking.  I would tell myself to not be afraid to ask and make the first move.  I would explain a three way and tell myself to not be weirded out by it.  I would show myself how to eat pussy and finger a girl and explain that it is vital to make sure that she cums first and many times.  I would have a long talk about monogamy and explain how later in life you will struggle with it so it would be better for you to just accept and live a polyamory lifestyle starting at a very young age.  I would also tell myself to work out a bit more, when you are younger and muscly you can get a lot more ass than when you are bone thin.

Bonus: What will your sex life be like when you’re 70 years old?
A. I can’t imagine having sex when I get wrinkly.
B. Probably a little sex here and there.
C. Hopefully my years of knowledge and hard work in the bedroom will pay off when I am having good sex in my 70’s.

I expect to still be in the market...literally....